![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
The things we want, and can have
Sep. 21st, 2010 02:57 pmETA: an edited version is also up on Samsara :)
I hate to admit this, but despite all my talk of living now I still find myself uncontrollably putting things off for when X has happened. Small things, big things. Silly things. I want to take a look at those things. I think we all should.
First, what are the reasons I don't do things?
-A big one for me is "things are about to change." As in, my schedule is about to change, my situation is about to change, my obligations, my income. So the excuse is "X is about to change, so no sense in starting something now when I might have to rearrange everything in a few days/weeks."
-Time. I like to sleep in, and when Jared gets home I like to have dinner and spend time together. If I spend time doing "X," I'm going to miss out on something else. And it will be a huge waste if I end up having to quit or if I can't do it
-I'm waiting for the right idea to come. I can't do "X" until it comes.
-I have all these other things I should really do first, before i decide to take on "X." "X" isn't as important.
And there are probably more.
Now, I'd say about 99% of that isn't a good enough excuse, wouldn't you? The only valid claim is, yeah, I probably shouldn't do task #3 when I have to do tasks #1 and #2 first, but why don't I just do them then?
So, what are some things I want to be doing?
-meditating, daily. 10-15 minutes, sitting in silence or with music. Good for the mind, good for the soul :)
-morning pages. gonna start up again, because I need a morning ritual badly, or else I end up wasting so much time... I'm not going to worry about the rolling out of bed and not saying anything to anyone until after I'm done, but I'm going to spend time each morning hand-writing three moleskine notebook pages of rambling thoughts.
-Eat hella better. My problem is I have all kinds of natural forces working against me, and I just love to eat. It's a Taurean thing; a Kapha thing (Ayurveda); a past life thing; a family thing. So I end up snacking on easy to grab crap, and ruining my palate, and eating more and more crap. Endless cycle. I, of all people, who know so much about how to eat healthfully without being restrictive, whose mother is a doctor of holistic medicine, who myself has worked in health food stores... I should be able to eat healthfully. I want to do this for many reasons: to lose weight, to feel better, to have more energy, to age gracefully, to just be healthier as a general rule.
-learn a foreign language. I've decided to learn German, because Jared wants to learn and I figure I can't pick a language (too indecisive) and it will help if we can practice conversation with each other.
-paint and draw more. because I love it. I just hate that I suck ;p
-play instruments more
-get on a regular schedule for Bikram
These are not things that I can really justify putting off. None of them are particularly time consuming, costly, or will negatively affect my writing or my relationship. If I say "Jared I'm going to paint for a few hours tonight" he's not going to be offended.
I'm going to start, all of these things. A little bit at a time, introducing them into my weekly routine. I'm tired of thinking about what I'd like to do- I'm just going to do it.
What would you like to do that you've been putting off?
I hate to admit this, but despite all my talk of living now I still find myself uncontrollably putting things off for when X has happened. Small things, big things. Silly things. I want to take a look at those things. I think we all should.
First, what are the reasons I don't do things?
-A big one for me is "things are about to change." As in, my schedule is about to change, my situation is about to change, my obligations, my income. So the excuse is "X is about to change, so no sense in starting something now when I might have to rearrange everything in a few days/weeks."
-Time. I like to sleep in, and when Jared gets home I like to have dinner and spend time together. If I spend time doing "X," I'm going to miss out on something else. And it will be a huge waste if I end up having to quit or if I can't do it
-I'm waiting for the right idea to come. I can't do "X" until it comes.
-I have all these other things I should really do first, before i decide to take on "X." "X" isn't as important.
And there are probably more.
Now, I'd say about 99% of that isn't a good enough excuse, wouldn't you? The only valid claim is, yeah, I probably shouldn't do task #3 when I have to do tasks #1 and #2 first, but why don't I just do them then?
So, what are some things I want to be doing?
-meditating, daily. 10-15 minutes, sitting in silence or with music. Good for the mind, good for the soul :)
-morning pages. gonna start up again, because I need a morning ritual badly, or else I end up wasting so much time... I'm not going to worry about the rolling out of bed and not saying anything to anyone until after I'm done, but I'm going to spend time each morning hand-writing three moleskine notebook pages of rambling thoughts.
-Eat hella better. My problem is I have all kinds of natural forces working against me, and I just love to eat. It's a Taurean thing; a Kapha thing (Ayurveda); a past life thing; a family thing. So I end up snacking on easy to grab crap, and ruining my palate, and eating more and more crap. Endless cycle. I, of all people, who know so much about how to eat healthfully without being restrictive, whose mother is a doctor of holistic medicine, who myself has worked in health food stores... I should be able to eat healthfully. I want to do this for many reasons: to lose weight, to feel better, to have more energy, to age gracefully, to just be healthier as a general rule.
-learn a foreign language. I've decided to learn German, because Jared wants to learn and I figure I can't pick a language (too indecisive) and it will help if we can practice conversation with each other.
-paint and draw more. because I love it. I just hate that I suck ;p
-play instruments more
-get on a regular schedule for Bikram
These are not things that I can really justify putting off. None of them are particularly time consuming, costly, or will negatively affect my writing or my relationship. If I say "Jared I'm going to paint for a few hours tonight" he's not going to be offended.
I'm going to start, all of these things. A little bit at a time, introducing them into my weekly routine. I'm tired of thinking about what I'd like to do- I'm just going to do it.
What would you like to do that you've been putting off?
