lathriel: (globe)
Spain portion of my trip has been blogged:

I'm so tired.

Morocco is coming soon, after I get photos from my friends.

Here's a random list of things I want:

A tattoo that has to do with the desert. I can't think of a symbol though. Ideas?

... Just to go back to the desert.

Time alone to write.

For my stomach to feel normal again.

To get paid to travel. How can I make this work? Travel writing? I'm open to suggestions, universe.

To be published and have an agent.

To feel grounded again (so many factors are making my brain swirly).

Things that I'm grateful for:

Awesome friends and family.

Awesome experiences.

The insane number of opportunities open to me (despite the overwhelming feeling I get when I look at them).

That I have an apartment and kittehs to come home to in June.

My growing sense of and understanding of Self.

Also, UBC is looking better and better every day. I know I dislike school, but people always say it's different in grad school. Hmm. We'll see. Research shall continue...

Also, I've been planning my first meal upon returning to Buffalo... I'm thinking something incredibly unhealthy. Nothing says "welcome home" like indigestion.

Also, I'm probably going to Athens at the end of May instead of bumming around London. I'm going into debt to do it, but that's fine because I'm awesome, and I will have a job very shortly after returning to the states. I have faith in that. You say "irresponsible," I say "why not?" Life is for the alive, my dears.

This post was very scattered. Good night!


Dec. 10th, 2008 10:26 pm
lathriel: (lovers)
Flight itinerary! )

It is really amazing how quickly this all came together for me. I know it's not like I didn't make it happen, but it was just so much... I don't know. I will never be able to forget the feeling in my stomach when I accidentally walked into that Study Abroad Fair, like I had a third hand actually reaching out from my solar plexus toward the UK.

I know that amazing things are going to happen while I'm abroad- it's just this ineffable, incredible knowledge in my bones- and I am so wonderfully grateful for this opportunity that it brings tears to my eyes sometimes- and if you know me, you know I'm not big on the whole crying thing. But it's really and truly just... literally awesome. :O (<-- awe face)

BTW I fully expect a welcome-home committee waiting for me at the airport ;p I'll be feeling needy, I'm sure!

personality test )


Nov. 18th, 2008 09:32 am
lathriel: (eek)
Word count has slowed because I'm not focusing on quantity any more... it makes it more difficult to just write through blocks. Last night was a disaster, but I haven't deleted it yet. I'm going to just make a note at the beginning of the document that the HUGE info-dump in chapter 19 needs to be dispersed and re-crafted.

My sleep schedule is all messed up, and I'm oddly okay with it, physically at least. Emotionally, even though I find myself awake around 6 every morning (having gone to bed no earlier than 12:30, usually later), I want to sleep more. But I really just end up thinking about novels I'm going to write/am writing. Since I'm doing good energy-wise so far, I'm rolling with it. ;D

... okay, so I just wrote a huge rant about time and people who assume things about other people's lives (who they barely know anymore) and then I realized I would do better to send out less bitchy energy into the world. So, instead, a list of things that I am grateful for:

-Being an unblocked writer, and the amazing journey it took to get here
-Having two *finished* manuscripts
-Having so many ideas for more...
-My amazingly talented and supportive friends
-My, uh, "quirky" family ;D
-The Law of Attraction
-My fantastic apartment
-My adorable kittens!
-I'm going to spend the next semester in England!:O (my mind is still blown)
-The magic of the internet
-peach black tea and honey with cream
-my ever-evolving spirituality and sense of Self
-Obama won!!!
-The fact that I can walk ;)
-my car's heater works

I could go on and on and on... why don't you guys post a list, too? Yay! It's Gratitude Day! Different from Thanksgiving, even if it's a week before it ;p
lathriel: (velveteen)
I am going to make 25 either today or tomorrow morning. My new goal is not to hit 50k by the end of the month (because I'm fairly certain I will, no problem, by the end of week 2) but to finish the entire draft. I write long stories- not short; not novellas; long. Two of the three novels I've written, 50k would only be slightly more than a third of the way through. I don't see this one going quite that long, but still. If I can finish the draft by the end of the month, I will consider myself a winner this year for NaNoWriMo.

Now, before any of you get the classic November "I hate you, but not really" response going, just remember that I have been consciously working (very hard, might I add) at unblocking myself as an artist, specifically as a writer, for over four years now. I went through hell and back to get to the point I'm at now, where words are flowing fairly steadily, and with enough confidence to keep me from going back and deleting them all. And I still get stuck- I still doubt my ability. But I persevere, because I know that artists- writers especially- are absolutely insane, and have no grip on reality when it comes to their own work and how good it is.


Every moment I find myself in the middle of spilling words onto a page, happily or not, I am more grateful than you can imagine to be caught in that flow. I am grateful for NaNoWriMo, for The Artist's Way, for Sacred Thursdays, and for every kind word you have all said about my work. And I think, really, that is the key- that is why I have been so happy these past 3+ months, and so able to confront my writing: because I am literally living a life of gratitude, and through that perspective, everything looks a little bit (or a lot) like magic.

Thanks. :)


lathriel: (Default)
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